Are you a mom?

We’re exactly a year into this whole thing and let me tell you. I’m exhausted. Housing, schooling, visas, save money, shipping boxes, starting a new business, paperwork, flights, save money, take a scouting trip, hope you find a city you like, maybe make some friends, save money, build a website, understand taxes (lol) have 7 yard sales, and somehow save MORE money. This whole thing is a rollercoaster of checking things off your to do list, keeping yourself emotionally regulated while planning to leave your whole life behind you, all while also trying to save more money than you’ve ever seen in your whole life. 

Denise and Davy from D&D Go Dutch

When I started exploring this option as a serious next step for our family, the very first thing I looked for was friends. Women, specifically moms, who had done this before and could help me feel less alone, less crazy, and maybe give some advice along the way. There’s a certain type of pressure we feel as parents to make sure our kids don’t have negative experiences (that’s for another blog on another day) and the only way I knew I could even attempt at making this transition smooth for our family was with help. And thank God we found it. 

In just my first month of searching I found Jana. She’s been an angel on earth for our family. We hired Jana for a few consulting calls where she helped me plan, take next steps and connect me with the right people. We ended up hiring her to plan a scouting trip for us where we would spend three full days in the Netherlands visiting as many people and places as possible. This was certainly draining but also exactly what we needed. 

We met with real estate agents (makelaar’s), couples who have made this move, parents, and more. We were very clear with Jana about planning our itinerary, we didn’t want to go to the museums or see the tulips (although this wasn’t an option in November anyways lol). I wanted to see what a regular Tuesday was going to be like. How long is my walk from home to my kids school? Where will I buy our families groceries? How easy is it to catch a train? Will my kids feel comfortable? Will they adjust? Will they be grateful for this experience or will they hate me for moving them across the globe?

Obviously I had some big feelings about this whole thing myself. So the people we connected with weren’t just answering questions about the basics of day to day life. They were providing peace for a mom who was terrified of making the wrong decision, not being prepared enough, or failing at this whole “experiment” of a journey we were taking. And I have to be honest. We’re 1 year into planning and 29 days from our flight taking off and I feel just as nervous and insecure. I am so scared our businesses won’t succeed, our kids will be traumatized and we’ll have to come home. And maybe that will happen. But also, maybe it won’t. Maybe we’ll have the adventure of a lifetime, feel safer than we’ve ever felt and find a place that finally feels like HOME. 

So, if you’re in the same boat as me 1 year ago and you know that the US just isn’t the place for you anymore but you have no idea what to do next… that’s what I’m here for. Especially if you’re a mom. You don’t have to be afraid to ask me the “silly” questions, share your uncomfortable concerns, or even cry a little. You’re talking to an empath here so I can handle it all 🙋🏻‍♀️. I’m just glad that like me,  you decided not to do this all by yourself and instead ask for help. If help for you looks like face to face personal and individual help, book a consult. If it’s digital downloads and free guides where you can follow a checklist and step by step, go to the shop and get what you need! Just know that this journey isn’t one you have to take alone. 

In a song I have been loving recently, the artists sings about all the things that she is scared of, and how for most of her life it left her paralyzed. Afraid of the unknown, she stays frozen and alone. But at some point, she has this realization, “all the trees are free and the oxygens available to everyone that’s trying to breathe”. While this process will never be without stress or some level of fear, my hope is that I can be a tree. Providing oxygen to anyone who is just trying to breathe.